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Now I know why all the great Zealots in history came to painful closure, the living was easy - but them principles and convictions hurt like hell!
I've been steeling myself since last week, figuring on a "Dead Cat Bounce" when the FOMC met today. I practiced grimacing in front of the mirror - bitter beer face, scrunched up and puckered... I knew what was going to happen, and resolved myself to the beating I would endure - swearing one oath after another, "You WILL NOT buy, YOU WILL sell..." - and with all that effort and all that practice, it was still a hideous, painful experience.
Mr. Market soaring 400 points is supposed to be a time of rejoicing, you call your favorite gal, spring for an expensive dinner and rejoice - firm in your conviction you're a financial Jedi.
Me? I'm laying in the gutter next to an empty Gin bottle uncaring whether I'm stepped on - as nothing could be more painful than vanishing 100K in 24 hours. Long hours, minutes lasting an eternity...
It's odd that "going long" and getting confirmation is righteous armor, but "going short" and enduring the result is no armor at all. You're standing naked as Wall Street erupts in laughter - with half the NYMEX pointing at you, holding their gut. You're hoping it's merely your zipper that's down, but when you check you'd wished you hadn't...
Would some floor trader throw me his badge so that I can cover myself? ...
I stuck to my guns, and endured the pain - purchasing only more SKF (Ultra Short Financial) as it was down over 20 points. By then I was over the self concious thing - and the hilarity that resulted when I placed the order was something I could tolerate - what's left to hide when everyone's seen Mr Winky?
I tried to summon enough courage for one defiant, "..well, You're all wrong!" but it came out like a Volkswagen beeping at the crosswalk, a plaintive, whimpering, "bleet, bleet" - that makes the target merely giggle.
I kept flashing on all them saints and martyr's we've read about - wondering if they had the same hollow feeling as the flames started licking their feet. I surely don't know what the future brings, I've made my bed and am content to play out the hand, but the stern look I'm wearing is all bluff.
I'm still short, and growing shorter.
KB
http://singlebarbed.com
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